Changes...

Some of you might not know: on Wednesday afternoon my MIL suffered a brain bleed that slowly resulted in her death on Thursday. My husband in town visiting her (a blessing), and will stay there through the funeral and closing up her rooms in her assisted living residency.

At his request, I am staying here in California keeping life "normal" back home.

I've been cleaning my studio, including going through lots of old papers. I found my morning pages from when i did TAW 6 years ago (around the time of my 50th birthday), and was surprised to see myself writing about the same kinds of things I wrote about Tuesday: feeling isolated and wondering at that time if it was healing or fear. Feeling a need to get myself back out in the world. And lots of fear.

I've been working in this area for a long time, but I finally feel like I'm MOVING beyond mere contemplation toward ACTION.

At that time I was also pulling a Tarot card each card to answer the simple question: what should I remember (how do I focus, what is the key) today? I use my Baseball Tarot cards because I love baseball so, and I find baseball a great metaphor for life.

My card today: The Ace of Mitts (Internal Beginnings). This card represents beginnings in the areas of life associated with emotion, intuition, receptivity, relationships, spirituality and love.

I also blog at: Weight for Deb and BlogHer on Mondays and Saturdays.