Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Playing with Names..

Starting this fantasizing while walking down to the coffee shop at the bottom of the hill for lunch.

If I had a:

Music blog, it would be Rockin' Roby.

Personal Finance? [Deb]It. (That one is genius!)

Food Blog? Yummy in my Tummy.

Beauty/Fashion/Shopping blog? Who am I kidding? Can you do a fashion blog about shopping at thrift stores?

Book blog it would a podcast where I'd read part of a book and a review to whet your appetite. Call it?

Sports/Fitness? is Weight for Deb.

Life blog? was Deb's Daily Distractions.

Travel blog? Where in the World Have I Plugged In My Laptop?

Not that I can could deal with another blog. But just the idea of thinking of some names was fun. Rather like the evening (at BlogHer??) where every great thought or line or idea became a dot something.

I also blog at: Weight for Deb and BlogHer on Wednesdays and Saturdays.

Friday, December 26, 2008

Koigu wrist warmers, finished 12/25/08

I bought 2 skeins of Koigu hand painted yarn several years ago. Kept waiting to be inspired to use them. This year I decided I wanted some wrist warmers (gauntlets, fingerless gloves.. whatever). I cast these on to one set of circular needles about Thanksgiving. Then knit them using the magic loop method. Bound them off on Christmas morning.

Ain't they grand?

Monday, December 22, 2008

Snippets: Small thoughts.

Snippet #1. With my dogs, I learn to distinguish between the sound of a dog padding around thinking which comfy place to sleep and the same dog padding around because it needs to go outside. Remarkably, the difference isn't the sound, it's where she's walking.

Snippet #2: Is there anything better to eat when it's cold outside than soup? Made myself some Thai Pumpkin soup last week to serve me for lunch the rest of the week. YUM. What does cold weather make you desire?

Snippet #3: I volunteer at the local Richmond Art Center for a couple hours a week (usually doing.. what else? computer work). Last week, I used a few spare to moment to shoot some impressions round the place. Enjoy. Those hand-thrown bowls are a center fund-raiser, sold at $8 each. Aren't they fabulous? Sometime try taking a close up look at your surroundings.

Snippet #4: Confession: When a really great song comes up on my Zen Stone (mp3 player), I dance or sing. I may "bench dance" at gym, "car dance" while I'm driving, dance dance around the house. Or - perhaps even worse for those around me - become another one of the band's back up singers. Do you have a silly confession to share?

Snippet #5: When I hear about all the snow being dumped around the country, I am so glad I live where I don't have to shovel it. Or drive in it. Yeah, we might have rain that makes me investigate the actual measure of a cubit.. but it usually goes down the storm drains (unless they're clogged).

I also blog at: Weight for Deb and BlogHer on Wednesdays and Saturdays.

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Crafty Christmas Decorations

crossposted at BlogHer

Between cold stormy weekends and school ending soon for the holiday, this is a great time to have some crafty holiday projects that can engage the whole family in a few time-killing, charming decoration-making activities. What says "keeping the family busy" more than a some glue, scraps of paper, or other craft-store finds?

Knick Knacks and Ric Rac showed charming Gingerbread Heart Ornaments with a Pennsylvania Dutch feel. Brown felt, colorful ric rac flowers, craft store pom poms and chenille sticks (pipe cleaners) make these inexpensive and charming.

Christmas Decoration Tutorials were the topic of Lisa Tilse's The Red Thread December 1st post. She aimed these specifically as projects for kids, and I think her colorful baubles hit it out of the park! Styrofoam balls, brightly colored scraps of fabric or paper, LOTS of glue is a combination that guarantees some mistake-proof messy fun.

Lisa also pointed us to Zakka Life's Flower Garlands. Made from cutting up one of the many catalogs we receive in the mail every day, these garlands are a cheerful decoration you can keep up all year.

While Berroco suggests these miniature knitted sweaters could be quite cool holiday ornaments, I envision them as inspiration for gift tags. Giving a hand-knit sweater or scarf this year? Use some of the scrap yarn to make a tiny version. I'm not knitting this holiday season; I'm sewing aprons. But I now see teeny-tiny aprons fused to card stock as my gift tags!

Living Creatively rates their Clay Ornaments as a beginner project that can be completed in 15 minutes plus drying time.
This is such a quick and easy way to make Christmas Ornaments and the results are just beautiful! You can hang the ornaments on the tree, tie them onto gifts or even use them as place settings. Working with clay is great fun and this is the perfect project to get kids involved in.
Felted Wool Sweaters were turned into adorable christmas tree ornaments by Dollar Store Crafts. I fluffy heart felted sweaters, this year I'll branch out to some decorations.

In the true spirit of extending an object's life, Susan Beal, contributor for CraftStylish, took old glass ornaments that had lost much of their luster and glitzed them up by gluing sparkly craft-store gems onto them.

We can't decorate for the holidays without some hand made garlands. If you're not in the daisy-chain garland stage of your life, check out another CraftyStylish project: An Easy Crocheted Holiday Garland by Linda Permann.

That's all I have for now, though I'm positive that more crafty goodness will be popping up in the next couple weeks. Will I save those links for next year, or share a few last minute quickies with you?

And what are your favorite crafty holiday decorations? Hit me up in comments with those you'd like to share


I also blog at: Weight for Deb and BlogHer on Wednesdays and Saturdays.

Monday, December 15, 2008

It's the time of year for introspection and stuff which led me to:

If I Rules The World (Earworm of song for an additional cost):

1. Nobody would be hungry. Food production and distribution would allow everyone to have sufficient healthy food every day.

2. Fast Food Junk Nation would not exist. (I know at the moment it's a choice people make; a choice that is killing them. A choice they don't believe they can't not make. I believe otherwise). I'm not saying there would be no junk food, I thoroughly indulge in Fried Chicken or a donut once in while. I even eat a whole a bag of potato chips. Just don't do it often or believe that when I'm doing it it's a meal. Or good for me.

3. Nobody would be thirsty. There would be clean water for everyone.

4. Each person would recognize their worth to society as a whole and would contribute however best they could.

5. Each person would have a safe, dry, comfortable place to live. It might be that not everyone would live in McMansions, but everyone would have at least a room of their own.

6. Creative endeavors would be encouraged from an early age. We are all creative. We may not all be artists, sculptors, or writers but we are all creative. These practices should be fostered to continue throughout one's lifetime.

7. Laughing should come easy.

8. People should be able to choose working at what they love and great passion for and working longer hours. Or working a mind-numbing job they can leave without another thought, but working much fewer hours. This would enabling the worker to go on and participate in their passionate activities in the increased free time.

9. Music, art, science, math, sports would all be valued in our education process and in our daily lives. The well-rounded soul would be encouraged.

10. Celebrities would those individuals who exhibited the greatness of the human race. Today's "pop celebs" would be more the

I also blog at: Weight for Deb and BlogHer on Wednesdays and Saturdays.

Friday, December 12, 2008

Miracle on Pier 48

I did not need to go the gym on Friday as planned; nor will I need to go on Saturday. That's because I spent 5 hours on Thursday volunteering for The Miracle of Pier 48. As a group, we provided food, personal care items, and toys to 5000 families in San Francisco.

Four of these hour I was among the army of volunteers directly working with the families. An individual, or perhaps a parent and child (or a couple adults) would be paired with 2 volunteers. We would walk them down the donation "gauntlet" picking up and carrying their goodies for them. This included:
  • 2 bags of frozen chicken parts
  • a box filled with non-perishable food such as beans and peanut butter
  • a box filled with toiletries (toilet paper, etc.)
  • one toy (most were video games that hooked up to the tv)
  • a bag of goodies from Avon
  • a case a water.
By the time we got to the end of this gauntlet both volunteers would be carrying ~30 or so pounds of goodies. And this gauntlet was about 200 yards long. That's a lot of hauling!

What struck me about many of the people we talked with was these were the described "working poor." These people worked hard and still needed help. Yes, there were the ones who were looking for as much as they could get and more. Allowed 1 toy, they groused because they 4. Many, however, were truly thankful for everything they got - including the human power to carry it all.

After the first 2 hours, everything stopped for an hour (a major tactical error). Pallets of supplies were moved and re-organized while most of the volunteers were given a break; some standing around time where nothing seemed to be happening (and I sought out a cushier position handing out goodies rather than picking them up. Did. Not. Succeed.)

Finally were told they were holding a press conference and we were all invited into the back of the pier to witness it. Former SF mayor Willie Brown was the MC. He explained how the entire function came into being (wish I had taken notes). He introduced the founder of Feed of Children who supplied the food.

Then the president of the NBA Players Assoc. spoke. The players assoc. provided much of the money to cover the cost of the items that were given. Every professional basketball player is taxed a portion of his/her salary to support NBA Cares. Each player is also encouraged to personally participate in several community events each year. There were 6 of the Golden State Warriors then introduced at our event.

When the press coverage finally ended, 100 or so of the families were brought into the area where the press conference took place. The players each had a station where they handed out the goodies and lots of press photos were taken. The family we helped was so overwhelmed by the idea of what they were being given (and likely tired from standing waiting for close to 2 hours) that I'm not sure they even knew they were standing near the players.

But let me say from personal experience that 7 food tall (when you're 5'3") is REALLY TALL and we had 2 centers working the event! Also, the players -many of them a much more "normal" height - were all genuinely friendly and seemed to be honored to be there.

Unfortunately, this work stoppage meant that the line of waiting recipients grew extremely long. We worked as fast as we could to get families through the gauntlet and out onto the street. Still, many people showed up after picking up their children at school. The line extended back the entire length of the pier and out the door. A program that was meant to end close to 5 pm, was going to be going strong until much later. I lasted as long as I could but about 5:30 I pooped out. I still had close to a mile walk back to the closest BART station and my arms and legs were killing me.

It was close to 7 pm by the time I got home. Bone tired, hungry, a blister on my right foot and sore to my core. It was a great day and I'll definitely be back next year if it happens. But I think I'll bring my own hand truck.

I also blog at: Weight for Deb and BlogHer on Wednesdays and Saturdays.

Monday, December 08, 2008

Giving a Gift of Recycled Jewelry

The holiday season is a time for glitter and glitz, and often gifts themselves glisten. Jewelry and jeweled items are popular holiday gifts. But with economic factors meaning that many people are cutting back, does this mean an absence of jewelry this year? Not necessarily. Especially if you consider recycling jewelry.

Gifting What You Have:

Are there pieces of jewelry you own that you don't wear anymore? Consider passing them on a family member or friend. BlogHer fellow CE Elena Cantor twittered:
I love pins so if I were to regift pins to friends they would know I'm giving them something I really love. Share the backstory.
I love this idea! If you select an item to gift, include the story of the piece. How you came to own it, special places you might have worn it. Pass on object and keep it's history alive.

Recycling Jewelry:


It's more likely that many of us would look through our jewelry boxes and find a number of items that are somewhat the worse for wear: necklaces in need of restringing, pins with broken clasps, bracelets that are out of style, earrings your tired of. How about taking these items and turn them into something completely new.

Here are a few suggestions:

Gather photos of you and a friend and print them out to make a 2009 calendar. Choose some of your earrings to dress up the photos.

Completely take apart jewelry pieces that aren't working, then:
  • If you have saved some chain (say from a broken necklace) turn it into a charm bracelet. Use a clasp you've salvaged and some of the dangles and beads from pieces. Attach them with jump rings.
  • Choose several necklace motifs and perhaps a few beads, wire wrap them onto plain napkin rings to make a set that looks like you spent a fortune.
  • String some beads and baubles together, then tie on the center of a piece of 10" ribbon. Tie the ribbon around a book to use as a bookmark.
  • Glue interesting piecing onto a picture frame to give it a customized look.

Buying Handmade Recycled Jewelry Or Inspiration:

WhipUp points to several Etsy ecocrafters.

Greater Yesterday has the idea. The Etsy shop specializes in remaking jewelry from vintage parts.

Kathy Cano-Murillo demonstrates making charm earrings in this video at MyLifetime. Recycle some of the baubles or charms from other pieces, or like her use scrapbbooking or other supplies to create your earrings.

Crafting a Green World's Juliet Ames gave instructions for a Junk Mail Jewelry. Turning junk mail into paper beads is a whole different way of thinking about recycled jewelry.

I also blog at: Weight for Deb and BlogHer on Mondays and Saturdays.

Monday, December 01, 2008

By Jove, I think I've got it!

By Jove, I think I've got it.

I've been taking the new med for almost 2 weeks now, and I think it's working. After a week of feeling and quiet and self-contained, then a few days of very low-level anxiety, I've found myself able to concentrate enough to read something more than a light fluffy novel. I've been able to plan several chores to do during the day and actually accomplish them.

It's a step in the right direction, and I'm glad to think I might be returning to my old self again soon.

I also blog at: Weight for Deb and BlogHer on Mondays and Saturdays.

Friday, November 28, 2008

Quiet.

A note to let you know I'm still here and OK. I know it's been a week (longer?) since I updated last; I have spent this week fairly quiet everywhere, not just here.

I have been quiet on my blogs.
I have been quiet in my email.
I have been quiet on Twitter (except for one day...).
I have been quiet in real life.
I have been quiet in my own mind.

I find myself being an observer on life. Simply sitting quiet and observing closing the life around me. The subtlety of emotions flowing over a friend's face. The interplay of light and shadow on the landscape. The rhythm of others lives.

I started new meds a week ago. I don't know if this quiet is part of the chemical balancing in my brain. If so, it will be temporary. Soon you will find a blog-orhea onslaught of news, links, and contemplation.

Mental conversations are beginning to return, which is the first step.

I also blog at: Weight for Deb and BlogHer on Mondays and Saturdays.

Friday, November 21, 2008

The Page 56 Game

This is going around again. I think last time I saw it was about 3 years ago? Anywho.. feel free to play and post your sentence in the comments.

Rules:
* Grab the book nearest you. Right now.
* Turn to page 56.
* Find the fifth sentence.
* Post that sentence along with these instructions in a note to your wall.
* Don't dig for your favorite book, the coolest, the most intellectual. Use the CLOSEST.


Mine:
"In spite of its delicate appearance, this is a straightforward pattern to knit and incredibly rewarding to watch grow!"
2-at-a-time Socks by Melissa Morgan-Oakes

I had next to me as I checking the right way to cast on for 2 wrist warmers using the Magic Loop method.

I also blog at: Weight for Deb and BlogHer on Mondays and Saturdays.

Thursday, November 20, 2008

Linky Love Eleven

Almost a perfect alliteration.

I've spent a remarkable amount of time this week saving blog pages and webpages to my delicious page. All the the intention of eventually using these when I need help or inspiration on a crafty post. So I'm not going to say a whole lot about these links today.

Instead, simply enjoy:

1. KnitWiki explains the magic loop with links to other tutorials on doing it. Magic Loop is how I knit.

2. Holiday decorations are nicest when they're hand-made! Gingerbread Snowflakes's tutorial is based upon the Japanese Timari balls.

3. These were popular a few years ago, and continue to sought because of their obvious recycle/green element: How to make a juice-drink pouch purse.

4. Continue with the idea of green crafts, wouldn't a bunch of MomsGoGreen Coffee Sleeves sewn from scraps in your stash be great stocking stuffers/hostess gifts?

5. AllSorts Criss Cross Coasters would be another GREAT holiday hostess gift.

6. Consumer Craft offers a list of beading instructions. Useful all the time.

7. Whole Foods offers a number of recipes for great home-made holiday gifts.

8. One Pearl Button offered a tutorial on turning a cashmere sweater into long gloves and a cloche. If your best sweater has developed a small hole (darn moths!) this is a great way to save it.

9. On a different vein, how about making a DIY R-strap for your camera? I didn't know I wanted this until I saw it!

10. Little Hut wrote a fabulous tutorial on recycling your junk mail into charming paper trees. So beautiful


11. Thinking you'd like to try knitting socks this winter? Here is a basic sock pattern.

OK. So you do have favorite tutorial/instructional posts to share?

I also blog at: Weight for Deb and BlogHer on Mondays and Saturdays.

Monday, November 17, 2008

Tidying Up Art: a TED talk

Today I am featuring Ursus Wehrli's talk on "Tidying Up Art." His observations are all about taking works of art and tidying them up. It's funny and thought provoking.



TED talks are always worth checking out. I will typically spend a Sunday every month just catching some inspiration. Enjoy.

I also blog at: Weight for Deb and BlogHer on Mondays and Saturdays.

Friday, November 14, 2008

As you might have noticed by quantity of my blogposts (a-hem)... I have had some issued over the last few many months that are interfering with my ability to put together cohesive and comprehensibly posts.

We won't talk about the computer problems plaguing me lately. My laptop was returned to the shop yesterday for another 2-3 week stay while replace the motherboard they replaced 3 weeks ago. Yes, 6 out of 9 weeks my perfectly set-up, all the programs I want just as I want them, everything customized and organized to my personal whims laptop has been gone. I've working on borrowed -and therefore not optimized for my personal tastes- laptops. Yesterday, when I took my laptop back, I just broke down and bought a new one. I'm working on getting it all perfect, but I think I need my old laptop back to compare notes, share files, and have them both looking/working the same. Then a weekly swap of data etc., and I should ready the next time something dies.

I digress.. we were talking about my not being productive.

Over these past many months I've had hundreds of starts; thank your stars these efforts hit the trashcan before I hit publish. Compelling? NO. Understandable? Not really. Readable? Not quite.

Between my chronic insomnia and the drugs I take to sleep, I've lost something of myself. Today I am finally seeing a doctor (a specialist) to help me find the way to being me, both outside and inside. I've been waiting 3 months to see this guy. While it is a very long time, it let me do some of the work on my own that we likely would have done together, so the time was not a waste. (fyi: there are drugs you must wean yourself off of slowly. Molasses in winter slowly. No matter how quickly you might wish to be switching to something else. I believe that work is done. Yay!)

Now I am of the "I want things to change, I want them to change RIGHT NOW!"

Part of me is thinking, I've already waited 3 months, when I return from this (very first getting to know us) visit I want a plan for the future outlined in detail steps 1-20 with a clearly stated outcome. I want to sleep tonight, wake up feeling good tomorrow, have my mind clear by Monday, and be able to remember shit like words and concentrate for longer than 30 seconds by the end of next week. (yeah, if I were clearer headed, I would re-write this sentence into something grammatical. Instead, I'm admitting my flaws and living with it).

I know I'm setting my standards too high.

So I'm wanting all those things, but realistically willing to settle for something less. Like a 5 step plan that ends with checking back with him in a couple weeks or a month. Maybe a blood test ordered (could all this be hormonal?), probably just the skeleton outline of a plan.

It's a step in the right direction,.

(just got a call from dr. office. He's out sick. Everything delayed until Tuesday night. I think this whole process is supposed to teach me something about patience. I'm hitting publish anyway.)

I also blog at: Weight for Deb and BlogHer on Mondays and Saturdays.

Monday, November 10, 2008

MeMe Time

Found on AllSorts

Where is your mobile phone? Recharging on the kitchen counter.
Where is your significant other?upstairs
Your hair colour? Dark Ash Blonde (at least that's what the box says).
Your mother? Was crazy, now deceased.
Your father? Dead.
Your favorite thing? I have to choose one?
Your dream last night? I do not remember dreams.
Your dream goal? I don't let myself dream.
The room you're in? family room off kitchen
Your hobby?creating
Your fear? disappearing and/or success
Where do you want to be in 6 years? Living in a condo in Oakland I think.
Where were you last night? Dinner at Won Thai, then home watching the Warriors.
What you're not? Confident
One of your wish-list items? Hike the Grand Canyon
Where you grew up? Cleveland, Ohio
The last thing you did? Vacuumed the first floor
What are you wearing? sweats and a t-shirt
Your TV? Flatscreen. And on.
Your pets? two dogs
Your computer? Windows
Your mood? apathetic
Missing someone? Nope.
Your car? 2002 VW Passat Stationwagon
Something you're not wearing? jewelry
Favourite shop? hardware store/book store
Your summer? a hazy blur
Love someone? Nope.
Your favourite colour? red
When is the last time you laughed? Thursday
When is the last time you cried? Wednesday

I also blog at: Weight for Deb and BlogHer on Mondays and Saturdays.

Thursday, November 06, 2008

Welcome Winter With Hand-made Hats

crossposted at BlogHer

I turned my clocks back Saturday night, resigning myself to the too-soon-dark evenings that are a daily reminder that winter is here. With these darker nights come more time snuggled on the couch knitting, crocheting or embroidering. And the perfect item to work on at the beginning of winter?

HATS.

Hats can dress up a dreary winter outfit, change the look of a too-often worn coat, and keep your head warm and dry. A pretty hand-made hat is also a great way to show one's crafty skills. So lets take a look at winter hats:

Making a great winter hat

When I found the Jayne Cobb hat pattern on Ravelry, I had to laugh! As a fan of Firefly, the idea of making and wearing this is especially endearing. Something I could crochet in an evening makes it doubly appealling. But the best thing about this pattern? It pointed me to the magic adjustable ring instructions which will make any project that begins with a crocheted circle easier in the future, even granny squares!

Grumperina's
niece, Sarit, is one lucky little girl. She gets a uniquely designed hat, loses it, and her aunt designs another one. So far Sarit has received: Odessa (requires a ravelry sign-in) and a Black Sea hat. Sarit's third hat is under construct: purple, beads, and an interesting cable pattern.

Lee Meredith discusses How to Knit a Stripey Short-Rows Wavy Hat as a contributor on CraftStylish.The patterns is a free PDF download that accompanies this post. I have some Koigu yarn that just might be perfect for this!

I know Chloe Nightingale calls her pattern The Bobble Headband but, as shown, wouldn't it make a nice hat for a long-haired gal? Or are those multiple layered headbands? Either way, it requires just a bit of yarn and almost no time.

Kevin and Nichole McIain offered directions for knitting a baby hat on a round knifty knitter! I don't own one (dare I say yet?), but these would be great for my friends' many grandbabies sprouting up!

Want something completely different? Craftster held a Felt-Along for needle felting a hat over a 3D form! These are similar to the gorgeous wool felt hats you find in boutiques and fancy department stores! Instructions even include how to make your own hat form.

I'm sure we can felt an old sweater, then cut it up and make a great hat, but I haven't found this exactly as a tutorial. Curiously Crafty, though, as a fantastic tutorial on sewing a hat with 3 free PDF downloadable patterns; startng with felted sweater is just an (unstated) option. And ThreadBanger gave instructions for turning a non-felted sweater this brimmed beanie.

Maybe you'd rather buy a hand-made hat?


Have you taken the Handmade Pledge? All it takes is a quick trip to Etsy to find crafters selling warm and wonderful hats!

TillyJane.net offers the charming "newsboy" styled Faith hats, each made from recycled sweaters and available for toddlers, children and adults. (I knew someone else would think of this!)

Monica Burnett offers a variety of knit hat styles for sale. I love her jasmine turban, with the buttons and beads trim!

FunnyFinn asks (rightly): Who knew hats could be so much fun? when she shows her fleece "neck-warming helmet." It's just one example of her whimsical fleece children's hats. Makes me wish I were a child again.

Where Finn is whimsical, Liza Rietz offers classic cloches, and momerath makes a two-color woolen hat sound romantic:
Winter is sexy. No really: Clouds of breath, ice-skating hand in hand, peeling off cozy layers, making up after snowball fights. ... This hat will fill the bill on two of those counts, at least.

Interested in hats for charity?

Warm Up,America! joined up with Save The Children for their "Knit one, Save One" initiative:
Save the Children's Knit One, Save One initiative is asking knitters and crocheters to take three steps before December 31, 2008: 1) knit or crochet A baby cap; 2) write one personal note to the new President asking him to lead the way to save millions of babies globally; and 3) if possible, donate $10 towards a "Newborn Care Kit" to help parents better care for newborns.
There are several very easy baby caps patterns available either for the knitter or crocheter.

Ronni Lynn Spolls requests that knitters make soft chemo caps:

"The Heather Spoll No Hair Day Hat Program"
We encourage each of you to knit one or two or a few chemocaps and donate them to a cancer treatment center in the area where you live. It's neighbors helping neighbors one chemocap at a time and yes it does make a difference!
They offer a variety of chemo cap patterns.. including patterns you can use for men going through chemo.

This is a start on the warm wonderful ways we can warm our heads. What are some of your favorites? Share them in the comments.

I also blog at: Weight for Deb and BlogHer on Mondays and Saturdays.

Wednesday, November 05, 2008

I Am Proud to be An American

For the first time in over 8 years, I am proud to be an American. The election of Barack Obama as our 44th President fills me with hope.

However, the work has just begun. We cannot wipe our hands clean, sit back, and rest on our laurels. Wresting the Presidency away from people who used divisive techniques, force and swagger to promote their agenda is just the starting point.

Now we have to learn how to grow as a UNITED nation again. Put away the "us" and "them" in favor of the "we".

In the next several months and years, we must work together to solve our economic problems, to find a workable plan to our energy future, to educate our population, to fight the growing epidemic of obesity.

These are just a few of the problems WE have to solve. Which means each of us needs to examine our personal priorities and commit to continue working forward with the same (or more) energy than was expended in this political battle.

What ISSUE are you willing to commit your time and voice to in the future?

I also blog at: Weight for Deb and BlogHer on Mondays and Saturdays.

Tuesday, November 04, 2008

I HATE Standard Time.

This time of year and in the spring, everyone complains about the time change. We hate the disruption that change brings. Yet many people declare that they LOVE Standard time.

Me? Not so much.

In case you're confused about which we have when, we are now in Standard time. Back in the 1800s when time standards were being adopted around the world, Standard time showed the relationship between local time and time anywhere in the world. It was mainly adopted to make train schedules work.

During WWI, many countries began adopting Daylight Savings time to save energy and increase productivity. At the moment, the US government has declared that -for most of the US- daylight savings time is in force roughly 7.5 months of the year (mid-March through end of October). Standard time rules during the winter months when increased darkness does little to effect energy savings.

Beside the disruption in sleep patterns (and I understand major confusion among animals), most people really have little problem with one time or the other. I say this because at BOTH time changes people complain about hating Daylight Savings Time and, I'm sorry, but you can only hate it at one change. If you really hate DST, then you spent the last weekend celebrating the clocks move.

I, however, truly hate standard time and was sorry to see last Saturday come.

See, like many animals, I have a set circadian rhythm. My body wakes up at its own same inner-clock time and does not fall back to sleep. I could lie in bed more, but I will get no additional rest. During DST, I awake within 10 minutes of 7 am; a decent time to get up considering I go to bed at 11 pm. Close to the eight hours sleep I need.

You see where this is going, right? During ST, I wake up at 6 am. Even if I went to bed at 11 pm. Even if I'm still tired. Even if it's dark.

My body doesn't recognize the time change and there is no way to train it to stay asleep an hour longer. I wish I could.

So I hate Standard Time and my lost one hour of sleep every night. I wish could accept it as the chance to be more productive for an hour, but that doesn't seem to happen. The extended dark doesn't lend itself to more productivity.

Those who love Standard time and hate DST, please tell me why?

I also blog at: Weight for Deb and BlogHer on Mondays and Saturdays.

Tags:

Monday, November 03, 2008

Quotes

I collect quotes as I wander around the internet. Quotes that speak to me or make me think of a friend who should hear these words. I save these in an draft post to keep them on hand.

But why not share these? Why hoard them to myself? I thought tonight that sharing some of these with you would be a positive step in a world full of less-than-positive. Here's 10 I've collected. Enjoy and please share a quote or two of your own in comments.

========================
“When we don’t turn away from pain, we open our hearts and are more able to connect to the best part of ourselves and others–because every human being knows pain. I’m not sure what enlightenment is, but I’m sure it has something to do with turning pain into love.”
–Myriam Greenspan, from “On Moving from Grief to Gratitude” in the January 2008 edition of Sun Magazine.
=========================
The soul won't invest in a compromise" Christine Kane's blog
=========================
“Worry often gives a small thing a big shadow.” - Swedish proverb
=========================
I must not fear.
Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
I will face my fear.
I will permit it to pass over me and through me.
And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.
Where the fear has gone there will be nothing.
Only I will remain. [1]
From DUNE.
============================
"The bulk of mankind are schoolboys through life." Thomas Jefferson
================================
Before something happens in the world, it must happen in your mind. CS Lewis
================================
"You can have anything you want
if you will give up the belief
that you can't have it."
~ Robert Anthony
================================
It’s the action, not the fruit of the action, that’s important. You have to do the right thing. It may not be in your power, may not be in your time, that there’ll be any fruit. But that doesn’t mean you stop doing the right thing. You may never know what results come from your action. But if you do nothing, there will be no results.
Gandhi
================================
“They say a person needs just three things to be truly happy in this world. Someone to love, something to do, and something to hope for.” – Tom Bodett
================================
"We must use time creatively . . . and forever realize that the time is always ripe to do great things.” Martin Luther King, Jr.
===============================

I also blog at: Weight for Deb and BlogHer on Mondays and Saturdays.

Saturday, November 01, 2008

Ghost Story

I wonder if we all have a true life ghost story? I do. Mine's a little different.

When I 20, my father bought a used car from a guy he worked with whose wife had originally purchased it. It was a 1970 AMC Hornet SST. It was determined that when I graduated from college, this car would be mine. And so it was.

Her name was Persephone. For the first several years we owned her, she would run like a dream until the first cold hints of winter blew in. Then she'd go to hell. Finding her name was the saving grace; a gentle little talk with her, an encouraging word, and she ran like as reliably as my current German-engineered car, but in a time when "running reliably" was not used with any automobile.

Most of the time, then and now, I drive in my cars alone. In Persephone, though, I never alone.

There was a palable spirit that resided in the back seat. A blur in the rear-view mirror that disappeared if I looked in its direction. A feeling of a protective soul watching out for me. A Back-Seat Driver. I could feel it (him? It always felt like a him) sitting just behind my right shoulder. Late at night, stopping at a drive-through for some kind of nosh, I'd always offer my protector of bite. He never took one.

I wondered if was me, comforting myself by creating this feeling of a protective spirit in the car. But why only in the car? If I created this spirit, I'd want it with me any time I was alone and needing protection: walking through a parking garage (still creeps me out); down a dark street; in a distantly located public restroom; along a quiet and deserted hallway.

OK, those places all STILL give me the heebee-jeebees! And I don't sense any ghost-protector.

It was only that car. When she was totalled in an accident and had to be replaced, at first I reveled in the sense of freedom I felt. No more spirit backseat driver looking over my shoulder. I have, however, come to miss that sense of companionship I felt; that never-being-alone-even-when-alone.

Nowadays, I'd welcome back that spirit.

I also blog at: Weight for Deb and BlogHer on Mondays and Saturdays.

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Linking to Creativity

My computer is back home. HP had to replace the defective fan (a common issue for HP laptops), and the fried mother board. Fortunately, my hard drive is was in tact. (exhales breathe I'd been holding for 2 weeks).

Using a borrowed computer meant it was always easy to save/share websites, but that doesn't mean I didn't find them:

Are you reading Creativity Prompt? This blog provides memes, writing themes, and journal making instructions to encourage you to "seduce your creativity." I like the early post on making your own hard-bound journal.

Live in the bay area? There is new fabric store in the city: WhizBang Fabrics.

Also, The Church of Craft is re-organizing, and has found a new home: Rock, Paper, Scissors Collective in Oakland. I haven't made it down to this place, yet, but a trip is definitely in my future.

Check out the inspiring winners of the 2008 World of Wearable Arts.

I LOVE A Little Hut's 3-D Trees made from junk mail.

Finally, Goody-Goody has a fast little project for a fabric covered bead bracelet These are a great way to use scraps of binding!

I also blog at: Weight for Deb and BlogHer on Mondays and Saturdays.

Monday, October 27, 2008

Photos and Aging, Are Living The Fountain the Youth?

Last week I received a CD from my brother with about 250 photos from childhood. I've begun to process these and upload to my Flickr stream. I think I'll organize them online by the decade (1950s, 1960s, etc.), though I'll admit that some of the dates will be a guess.

One thing struck me while working on these. I have photos of both of sets of grandparents, taken about the time I was born, which means my grandparents are about my current age.
1951, maternal grandparents

1951, mike, paternal grandparents

They look old.

It's not just that I don't look as old as them, it's that nobody my age looks as old as grandparents do in these photos. I don't think it's hair color or hair style or glass frame. It might be weight, but I doubt it. Somehow in 2 generations, we've all found a fountain of youth that has us looking about 10-20 years younger than our grandparents did.

Genetically that can't happen in 2 generations.

What has caused the change? Is it better medicine keeping us healthy? I don't think so; my grandparents -with the except of one with type-1 diabetes - were quite healthy at this time. They had not had heart attacks or episodes of cardiac problems that occurred later.

Could the nutritional improvements that occurred when we young have such a dramatic effect that we are physically aging more slowly than previous generations? If so, what does that mean for our children and grandchildren who are consuming a hugely processed diet? Will we be an anomaly blip on the genetic chart? THE generation that somehow got it right?

If it isn't nutrition or health care, what else could it be? I can't imagine. But I'm curious...

Or am I wrong?

I also blog at: Weight for Deb and BlogHer on Mondays and Saturdays.

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Baker's Aprons

I've been attracted by simple baker's aprons/market aprons as a way to use some of my stashed 1 yard pieces of fabric. These aprons are easy to wear, simple to sew, and useful gifts to have on hand.

I used a finished apron for my pattern, then forgot to add seam allowances when I traced the design. This left me with a finished apron that was just that much too short, too short-waisted.

Darn. A creative solution is called for.

I was always planning on using a contract fabric for the trims and straps on these aprons. So I simply cut them in half and created a "contrast fabric" waist that puts everything back where it belongs. In the case of the market aprons (those with a pocket running along the bottom), the contrasting fabric is also used there.

I like the way these aprons are turning out. They are cute, fast and great way to use some stashed fabric that I'm not sure what I intended to do with.

I'm working on a short tutorial for this, but there are a couple reasons that this post must remain photo-less. I'm having a problem with yahoo/flickr and I'm temporarily blocked out of my account (AAAAHH!). Also, my computer is at the shop getting a new motherboard. I'm using a borrowed computer and trying not to do things such as upload my photos here (instead of my own computer). Have no fear, though the pictures are being shot, the tutorial is being written and Yahoo and I are working on my proving to them that I'm who I say I am.

The photos are coming. The aprons are coming. I'm sewing again.

Life is returning to good.

Sorry, no photos with this post. I'm having trouble with Yahoo and Flickr that need to be worked out before I can get back to my photos. Als

I also blog at: Weight for Deb and BlogHer on Mondays and Saturdays.

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

An Open Letter to Some of My Very Bestest Friends

Dear Best Friends I’ve Had In the World (and you know who you are).

There are lots of things that I love about you gals. I love the way you know one member can’t digest nuts, so bake batches of cookies both with and without nuts in them.

I love that you know some gals are allergic to shrimp or shellfish, so you only make paella when they are not in town.

I love that you except that one member FREAKS OUT BIG TIME at the smell of tumeric or the word “curry” so you try to keep both away when she’s around.

I love that we know one girl grew up with too many beans begin forced down her gullet, so we don’t bring those to dinners and watch squirm(though that squirm is funny!)

I love that on trips we occasionallly stop at a restaurant because one member approves of the tea they serve (black, plain, brewed, not mixed with the coffee brewing system).

I really love that one of you who is allergic to strawberries drove all around the county to get me strawberry pie for my 50th birthday, because THAT'S what "birthday cake" means to me.

BUT when do I finally get equal treatment?

It’s been over 20 years that I’ve known I have an allergy to cow’s milk. While it’s true, if I’m healthy and the dosage is small, all that will happen is a slight cough. No trip to the ER or anything. Greater exposure and I’m hit with allergic bronchitis which can be treated by Mucinex and allergy pills. During the winter months, or if I’ve already gotten a cold? the dairy will require me to take these meds for 4-6 weeks. Twice a day. Just because I’ve eaten some cow milk.

This one isn’t new - to me or you - yet you never seem to remember that OH YEAH, DEB IS ALLERGIC TO COW’S MILK, SO LET’S PLAN SOME FOODS THAT DON’T HAVE IT IN. A couple of you actually sound offended when I questioned last week why so many of the foods we had at a party contained cow’s milk. We will travel to a retreat together, go out for a tea or celebration - plan what sounds - to me - like a safe menu and then you change it to challenge what I can eat. And you complain when I express my frustration.

Worse is when you ask me to “just eat a salad”. Like I don’t deserve warm/hot food like everyone else because I’m being “difficult” with my food choices. Because my allergy only means difficulty breathing not an epi pen episode. Because it’s easy for you to cook with milk and cow’s milk cheese and you don’t want to change. Ya know, they make some might fine cheeses from goat and sheep milk, and you can even find them at Trader Joe’s!

While we’re talking, I’ve discovered something important these past 2 years. For years I lived on TUMS to fight heart burn. TUMS all day (even if I said I was using it because I don’t consume cow’s milk and need the calcium).. TUMS for the heart burn.

I’ve discovered that if I limit - or eliminate - wheat from my diet, I don’t need to take the TUMS. Hmm. Wheat = heart burn. It’s a recent discovery. I haven’t shared it with you all because you look at me like a 2-headed freak for not using cow’s milk; if I start talking wheat, too, I figure it’s all over. Although you accommodate a lot of other strange food requirements, these two may land me in “never invite anywhere, she’s too whacky” list.

There are many fine grains grown in the world: oats and rice are common, spelt, quinoa (yuck), ya want to list a couple dozen more?

So do think it might be possible once in a while to plan meals we share together - or consider restaurantswe visit- to accomodate the person who is trying to avoid wheat and cow’s milk. That isn’t that difficult: choose an Asian restaurant and I’m probably golden. Most Asian diets do not use cow’s milk and much prefer rice to wheat. They tend to be fairly safe on the bean issue (except perhaps for edamame) and I’m sure they can brew tea by the pot any way the drinker prefers.

Think about it. Afterall I thought I was one of your very bestest friends in the world, too.

I also blog at: Weight for Deb and BlogHer on Mondays and Saturdays.

Monday, October 06, 2008

You WANT to rent this movie!

Monday evening my girlfriends and watched this movie as part of a memorial/birthday celebration. You want to see this too! It makes you young and hopeful and happy.




I also blog at: Weight for Deb and BlogHer on Mondays and Saturdays.

Saturday, October 04, 2008

Deb's Utterz


utterli-image
Sleep is for the weak

Mobile post sent by debroby using Utterlireply-count Replies.  mp3

Thursday, October 02, 2008

Casa de Murillo at the Museum

A YouTube video tour of Cathy Cano-Murillo's exhibit at the Heard Museum in Phoenix, AZ. Glitter, Virgins, Day of Dead... color, color, color..



Cathy shoots video like I do, except she remembers to talk!

Besides Cathy, do you know any Latina crafty-bloggers? I'm looking for some for an article I'm working on. Please hit me up with any links you've got.

I also blog at: Weight for Deb and BlogHer on Mondays and Saturdays.

Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Challenge Anyone??


The Skooba DIY Laptop Bag at the MAKER SHED is SCREAMING to become the basis of an art/craft challenge, isn't it??

Now who? how? to go about organizing it?

From the MakerShed page (photo from the same page):
This blank canvas sleeve is instantly ready to make a one of a kind work of art using permanent markers, fabric paints, glued-on decorations, sparkles, stenclis, pens, airbrush, needlework/embroidery or other medias*


I also blog at: Weight for Deb and BlogHer on Mondays and Saturdays.

photo credit:

Monday, September 29, 2008

Standing Strong

(believe it or not, I am close to returning to insane crafty goodness on this blog. Just a little longer...)

I am a strong person. I speak not about physical strength. When the chips are down, I am the one that people lean on; the one who doesn't crumble; the one who stands for the weak.

I am a strong person.

I do not know how much of this is a natural part of my personality and how much is a part of my environment. I have felt emotionally responsible for myself since I was a very small girl (ah the joys of child abuse! It makes you strong quick.) Still, my personality lends itself to being a strong reliable soul. A woman warrior.

A couple years ago, a young friend, himself a strong soul, mentioned a wish to me. He wished that there were times that the weak could pick up the burden for a while, be strong for him, let him - just for moment - be weak.

I stood beside him and wrapped an arm around him. I did not speak. The words I would have said might have hurt him more as the truth is:

We who are strong will NEVER TRUST another to be strong for us. The MOST we can hope for is that another strong soul will stand beside us, giving support, standing strong with us.

Today I'm standing strong. Come stand beside me.

I also blog at: Weight for Deb and BlogHer on Mondays and Saturdays.

Saturday, September 27, 2008

Understanding My Click-Click

There are days when I spend hours trolling the nets, clicking from here to there.. repeating the same steps over and over again:

Gmail.
Twitter,
Facebook.
Flickr.
BlogHer.
MySpace.
GoodReads.
Something new??

Click and repeat.

Clicking out to new links, then back to the home space. Click, move, read, move, click, click, click. I'm always anxious and become more anxious in the movement. It's compulsion in medium high gear. It's obsession and hunger and anxiety and emptiness.

I have always thought that it's me saying FEED ME. Entertain Me. Engage Me. Notice Me.

I just figured out that it's really me looking for the inspiration to engage myself. What I'm compulsively looking for isn't anything external. It's not the latest viral video or piece of gossip. It's not a a new friend. It's myself.

I'm trying to escape having to deal with myself.

Those are the times when I need to be blogging. My concentration is down to mere milliseconds, but I need to take a deep cleansing breath, open my editor and begin to discover what I'm running away from in my soul.

I also blog at: Weight for Deb and BlogHer on Mondays and Saturdays.

Saturday, September 20, 2008

Deb's Utterz


utterli-image
At the ball game

Mobile post sent by debroby using Utterlireply-count Replies.  mp3

Monday, September 15, 2008

Start Getting Ready for Halloween/Day of the Dead

The Crafty Chica has posted a neat video over at LifetimeTV on how to craft your own mask from plaster tape. She's then decorated hers (of course) as sugar skulls for Dia de la Muerte.



I also blog at: Weight for Deb and BlogHer on Mondays and Saturdays.

Friday, September 12, 2008

Secrets No Longer

I surprised myself Thursday evening and shared a couple secrets with a friend by email. NOT little secrets like what I'm making a friend for a xmas present. BIG secrets. Secrets that I'm sure I've shared with others at times. In the past, however, they were not quick, not unplanned, not just spilling them out like every-day news.

Last night, I shared these secrets the same way I share what I ate for dinner or what I did yesterday.

In the past, they were shared in whispers or in tears. They were shared with shame. Last night they were sent without any of at. Matter of fact. This is what's happened to me. It's formed me; it's informed me; it's part of who I am. Felt that maybe today this friend needs to know this about another human being: me.

My friend didn't ask for them, doesn't expect them. I wonder what the reaction to reading these will be.

I don't know why they suddenly came out in an email. Or why, when given the breath to consider and delete the message (my normal way of dealing), I instead hit send.

Something is changing about me; I'm starting to accept who I am secrets and all. And I'm starting to expect others to accept me and my secrets too.

But, hey, I'm just starting.. you notice I kept a lot of secrets in this post, now, didn't I?

I also blog at: Weight for Deb and BlogHer on Mondays and Saturdays.

Thursday, September 11, 2008

In Crafty Video News...

Did you see that CRAFT IN AMERICA, the PBS special from last spring that bloggers RAVED about was nominated for an Emmy this year? This after winning the Peabody award for television excellence last spring! Will have to watch the press releases in about 10 days to see if it won this second award.

If you have forgotten, the producer emailed me last spring, and I blogged about on BlogHer:

(me) I saw a large number of bloggers writing about the program before it aired. I'm certain that the ratings can and should be attributed to ALL the bloggers spreading the word. Congrats to us all!! We made a difference, it was noticed, and we shall reap the reward: More Programs! (though a thank you in the form of a complimentary DVD would have nice... I'll take more programs!)

A belated thank you for the wonderful coverage Craft In America received May 29, 2007 on BlogHer. The response from your readers must be considered when we look at the ratings for the series, which were excellent. Over 2.3 million households tuned into the first airing of the series on May 30th!

On the strength of the ratings and because they had a very positive personal reaction to the first three episodes, two of our supporters have decided to support future programs. This is especially good news because there is still so much of the story that remains to be told.

Hopefully we can look forward to a couple episodes this coming spring. If you missed the series first time around, check out this preview video. Sorry, there is no way for me to embed that video here.

So instead, I share a preview for a documentary that hasn't premiered yet. Faythe Levine's Handmade Nation:


I also blog at: Weight for Deb and BlogHer on Mondays and Saturdays.

Sunday, September 07, 2008

BlogHer interviews Obama



This is my friend Erin Kotecki Vest (aka Queen of Spain) interviewing presidential candidate Barack Obama. The BlogHer community compiled a set of questions and approached each and every candidate before the primaries ended, requesting that they sit for an interview or atlest answer these questions.

Obama was the only one who took up the request.

Most candidates offered to let BlogHer speak with their wives; I'm not sure what the Clinton camp said, as I wasn't paying that close attention. Granted, this is a couple months old; I just found it on YouTube. (I'm way behind on finding stuff I want on YouTube...)


I also blog at: Weight for Deb and BlogHer on Mondays and Saturdays.

Thursday, September 04, 2008

Deb's Utterz

utterz-image
Carquinez Straits from Capt. Blyther's. The end of First Street, Benicia, Ca.

Mobile post sent by debroby using Utterz. reply-count Replies.

Deb's Utterz


Mpp

Mobile post sent by debroby using Utterz. reply-count Replies. mp3


OK. You have 10 minutes to get the phone call and the photo sent for them to show up together. Looks like I missed that time slot. The picture is above, the audio is here.

Sunday, August 31, 2008

Heading to IKEA

Heading to IKEA in Emeryville, then lunch at PF Changs. Happy.

Mobile post sent by debroby using Utterzreply-count Replies.

Saturday, August 30, 2008

Art and Soul and 12 of Bats

It's Saturday, the weather is returning to it's normal pleasantness after several days of HEAT, it's a holiday weekend, and I'm alone. It's all cool.

I'm spending the afternoon in Oakland at Art And Soul. Music, Food, Art in the outdoors for a reasonable cost. How can I NOT go? I'm getting used to attending these things by myself; often I end up running into someone I know (which makes it even more pleasant). I'm taking my camera, and my phone and will try to remember to send an update or two here through Utterz.

Oh, and my tarot card for the day? The Twelve of Bats (extra innings). The Play: Adventures. Pursuing an interest. Putting out extra effort to get waht you want. Off-the-cuff action. Feeling vibrantly alive. Courage. Daring. Willingness to throw yourself into things.

Seems like a great card to pull with the day planned!

I also blog at: Weight for Deb and BlogHer on Mondays and Saturdays.

Friday, August 29, 2008

Changes...

Some of you might not know: on Wednesday afternoon my MIL suffered a brain bleed that slowly resulted in her death on Thursday. My husband in town visiting her (a blessing), and will stay there through the funeral and closing up her rooms in her assisted living residency.

At his request, I am staying here in California keeping life "normal" back home.

I've been cleaning my studio, including going through lots of old papers. I found my morning pages from when i did TAW 6 years ago (around the time of my 50th birthday), and was surprised to see myself writing about the same kinds of things I wrote about Tuesday: feeling isolated and wondering at that time if it was healing or fear. Feeling a need to get myself back out in the world. And lots of fear.

I've been working in this area for a long time, but I finally feel like I'm MOVING beyond mere contemplation toward ACTION.

At that time I was also pulling a Tarot card each card to answer the simple question: what should I remember (how do I focus, what is the key) today? I use my Baseball Tarot cards because I love baseball so, and I find baseball a great metaphor for life.

My card today: The Ace of Mitts (Internal Beginnings). This card represents beginnings in the areas of life associated with emotion, intuition, receptivity, relationships, spirituality and love.

I also blog at: Weight for Deb and BlogHer on Mondays and Saturdays.

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Breakfast at Java Jax's in Vallejo

0827080749.jpg


Eating scrambled eggs and bacon on whole wheat with a cuppa joe. This is a hangout for the locals: police and Highway Patrol, merchants, etc. Nice vibe.

Mobile post sent by debroby using Utterz. reply-count Replies. mp3

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Coming Clean

Decided maybe it's the right time to come clean with a number of you. Things have changed on this blog; the tone, the frequency, the passion. It's different.

I'm telling you all a secret I've been hiding for almost 2 years.

I'm fighting a battle with anxiety and (coming up from behind like that proverbial one-two punch) depression. The anxiety has been a constant companion since 12/15/06. I can't give you the exact time, but I pinpoint the moment.

My spouse said: When I retire, all I need from life is you and the dogs.

I haven't slept a night without drugs since that moment. Because in my life I need 95% more than I can get from this man and my dogs. I don't want to be responsible for his whole life and I don't want to limit myself to his life decisions. It all feels quite small.

I spent a lot of time trying to work out this condundrum. We've been married almost 25 years. Probably the first 3-5 were good; most of the time since then has been living by rote and habit. But it's A LOT OF TIME.

This year the anxiety has grown to the point where it's sometime overwhelming. Yes, I'm taking some meds to control it, I'm seeing a psychologist to give me someone to talk to. I'm working on it. The shrink says that the anxiety is the pent up energy from not acting on life and the fear of change; acting will eventually give this energy a source to expend and it will decrease.

I've made the clear intentional decision that if I am unhappy and dying in the life I'm living, it is my responsibility alone to change things. To work toward living a live that feels more authentic and more real. To get out in the world more; which necessarily means getting away from the safety net that is this lonely empty house and the interwebs for times each day.

It means building a life for me that IS much bigger than my spouse and our dogs.

I will be looking for work that gets me involved in helping people. I'm good at that. I will be looking for volunteer opportunities that feed my creative spirit; it's almost completely buried under the fear and loathing and fear that I battle every day.

I don't know how my life is going to change in the next few years, but it needs to change. I fear deep in my soul that a lack of change now means that I will follow my grandmother and mother who both gave up on the idea of living their lives.. and lost themselves to Alzheimers disease at ages just a few more than my current age.

My spouse? He will have to make his own decisions. Change, remain the same, move on, or die. It's his life for him to be responsible for not me.

Honestly, this is all very hard and the energy to write this and the energy to live it takes away from the power to do much more.

Let me say that I feel the support from many of you even when you knew what I what was doing. Before the first comment hits the page (or the private email hits my box), I know you stand beside me holding me to my best intentions.

Thank you for this. It means the world.

Now excuse me while I head out into the light of the world and breathe some fresh air.

I also blog at: Weight for Deb and BlogHer on Mondays and Saturdays.

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Say Hey!

Listen to this song and just try to keep your hips from swinging and your lips from smiling.

I Love You!



I also blog at: Weight for Deb and BlogHer on Mondays and Saturdays.